No One Mourns the Wicked

I've been inspired to share a piece of wisdom with all of you this evening. I'd like to share with you a list of all the popular shows I've seen/researched recently and the reasons why/why not to take children with you.

• Spamalot (which I just got home from): INAPPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN due to raunchery and innuendo.
• Beauty and the Beast: APPROPRIATE however be warned that squirmish kids could freak out at the sight of the beast. Depending on which production you see there will be other frightening sequences.
• Wicked: INAPPROPRIATE due to innuendo and lots of frightening scenes. On top of all of this they could begin quoting Galindaisms which will result in a depleting vocabulary. I wouldn't recommend taking a child under the age of 12 to this show.
• Billy Elliot: INAPPROPRIATE due to much crass language, adult themes, and the overall depressing mood established by the set.
• Spring Awakening: COMPLETELY INAPPROPRIATE due to the theme of the musical revolving around adult themes. Please, do not take anyone under the age of 15 to this. Even then you should be using your judgement.
• Phantom of the Opera: INAPPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN UNDER 13 due to frightening scenes and innuendo and allegorical adult themes. The symbolism and meaning will blow over their heads, but the musical can be quite suspenseful at times.
• Rent: INAPPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN UNDER 15 due to many, many, many adult themes. Do not let your children see this.
• Chicago: INAPPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN UNDER 13 due to scantily clad women throughout and adult themes.
• Avenue Q: INAPPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN UNDER 15 due to language and adult themes throughout. It may look like it's target at children since it involves puppets, but it is most certainly not. Just read the titles of songs on the soundtrack if you need an example.
• Mamma Mia: INAPPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN UNDER 13 due to adult themes throughout. Just because your kids know Dancing Queen doesn't mean they understand the innuendo behind the lyrics.

This is a short list because I'm tired and have early class tomorrow and would like to get off to sleep. I will add to this list as I see fit to do so. Please understand that I find all of these to be quality performances and I enjoy them greatly. I just find that we are corrupting our future generation by exposing them to subject matter that they should not be exposed to entirely too early in their fragile, impressionable lives. Exercise caution before escorting your children to a musical.

Also, please enjoy the new look of Witticisms While We Waltz. I was inspired to make it more like my personality. I'm going to attempt to manage another blog that I have yet to title that walks you through the recipes and struggles I go through as I diet over the next few months. You'll be the first to know about it.

Witticism of the Day: Turn "can do" into "can did" (I may have stolen this from a cough drop wrapper...it's hard to tell).